Something Different

It all began with a fortune, you know, from a fortune cookie:

My fortune at dinner that night.

These things are usually meant to be pretty generic, but it’s always amusing (and sometimes I think God-ordained) when they line up with actual events about to happen in your life. In this case, I knew that what I had planned for my weekend was going to be different than normal. What was it you ask? This:

Yay for the arts!

I accompanied a poem reading on violin for an art expo at a local church. There were singers, dancers, musicians, and fine artists of all sorts—and completely free. It was worth the time, and I thoroughly enjoyed myself. 🙂
That’s all I really have to say about that… but not quite. I don’t really have much to say about performing, but I do have something to say about the experience.

I observed many things about myself through this event—mainly, that I need “alone.” I’ve been around people and their “noise” almost constantly since last school year began and I started realizing through this event that I had forgotten who I was. Aloneness gives me a chance to talk to myself and remember lessons I’ve learned and places I’ve been. If I don’t spend time with myself, I forget who I am. My identity doesn’t readily flow out of me, I have to be intentional about being me. This is a hard thing. It takes me a while to get past the initial depression of loneliness, but once I do, I find myself coming alive like never before and enjoying the company of others more fully. Perhaps this is just one of the many intricacies of being an introvert. Whatever it is, it certainly is something different, and I can’t wait to explore it more.